The No Talent Ass Clowns performed their new song “I Finished, Now Get Out!” on The Doug Fredericks Show recently. It was an amazing performance, given that the band seldom allows fans into their concert arenas anymore.

“This song is really a tender love ballad,” said front man Lars Gunblade. “I’ve heard that a lot of people will be playing ‘I Finished, Now Get Out!’ at high school proms this spring. I can see that! I really can. If I was a chick, I’d wanna do it after hearing this song. I mean, guys, I’m helping you out here. This song is better than a bottle of whiskey, although obviously that helps as well. So, you’re welcome.”

Unfortunately, some horrible people have posted this video under titles like “Worst Rock Band Ever” as shown above, which only serves to infuriate the band. “Hey, we’re awesome,” says Gunblade. “I’m sorry if some people can’t see that.”

Doug Fredericks Show Isn’t Popular With The Band

“Normally, we wouldn’t do bullshit daytime shows like the f*cking Doug Fredericks Show,” said guitarist Vas Defrens. “However, Doug Fredericks has some incriminating photos of our manager Jerry Gold so we got roped into playing. Fortunately, Doug’s assistant was some foxy Swedish chick who was seriously into leather so it all worked out pretty well. We did it on the desk in Doug’s office right after the broadcast. Turns out his office has no curtains or blinds so the people in the building across the street got the best live sex show on the planet, if I may say so.”

Host Doug Fredericks of The Doug Fredericks Show is no fan of the group but wanted them on his show anyway. “The Ass Clowns really pull in the ultra perverts. And I need to reach that demographic,” said the aging host after the show. “The band left my green room in shambles. I can’t believe what pigs these guys are. And that song of theirs was disgusting. The only good thing to come out of it was that my assistant, Gretchen, finally let me make sweet love to her later in the evening after the broadcast. I guess that song may have played a part, I don’t know.”

COMMENT ON THIS BLOG

  1. Dolph Heyliger says:

    While I was watching this, my dog died on the couch next to me. I think there’s a connection.

  2. Jonathan Harker says:

    I like the song but these guys look like dicks.

    • Jonathan Hutter says:

      You don’t know nothing. My good buddy Orlok agrees with me. You’re a major league dick.

  3. Willard John says:

    If you listen to this song, the terrorists win. I’m not sure why but I know it’s true.

  4. ANR says:

    This could have been the theme song of my last five boyfriends.

    • E. Blofeld says:

      Are you sure you aren’t the chick in the song? After all, you offer up the ol’ back door to every dude, don’t you? I mean, you did to me and I most definitely partook.

  5. Mary Lou says:

    Please excuse not English very good. Personally, this song is good. It make me horny big time. Jeans are creamed that I wear after hearing the song. I fuck up mail man real good after hearing the song. So this song is good.

    • Jean Luc says:

      Wow, lucky mail man. Hey, “Mary Lou” perhaps you and I could listen to the song together on my yacht. I got a color TV.

  6. Todd Brainsgod says:

    Why the f**k are you linking to some asshole who calls them “the worst rock band ever”? Seriously, get a clue, morans.

    • Throbbing Member says:

      On the contrary, “worst rock band ever” perfectly describes the No Talent Ass Clowns. They certainly got their name right. This song was just plain wrong on so many levels.

      • Father MacKenzie says:

        I love “I Finished, Now Get Out!” and I think you’re a total asshole who deserves cancer of the throat. So be it.

        • Glutamate Jones says:

          No, Throbbing Member deserves penis cancer (if there is such a thing). Seems more appropriate given the bullshit name he uses here.

  7. Candi Cannon says:

    I’ve never heard of the No Talent Ass Clowns or the Doug Fredericks Show. But I have to admit this song says a lot about my life.

    • Phillip Traum says:

      I didn’t realize the Doug Fredericks Show was cool enough to have on the No Talent Ass Clowns. Maybe I’ll start watching.

      • Joey R. says:

        I was in the studio audience for this show. It was amazing. When they went to commercial, Vas pulled out his thing and the crowd went crazy. Some girl from the audience ran up and started giving him a BJ. I’m totally serious.

  8. Billy Joe says:

    I can’t believe the Ass Clowns were on the Doug Fredericks show. That show sucks. What total sell-outs these guys are!!!!

  9. Not Lew Flapp says:

    Wait! Let me get this straight. The chick in this song offers him anal twice and he refuses? What the hell is wrong with Lars Gunblade? I used to think he spoke for me but he lost me here. Totally lost me. It’s a great song except for that part.

    • Rev. Scott says:

      Take it from Robert Plant’s 5th Commandant: Thou shalt not accept anal from just anyone.

  10. Dimitri Hilter says:

    This song was rather touching. I didn’t think Lars could come up with a rock ballad but I guess I’m wrong. My girlfriend actually cried after hearing it although she was chopping onions at the time.

  11. Meat Pants says:

    That song is the soundtrack of my life. Thanks Ass Clowns.

    • The REAL Hammer says:

      I have a faux red leather couch and I have banged a number of women on it. I believe this band is stealing my ideas. I’m going to sue them in court, I think.