Rock Wasteland Magazine

Yet another entire issue devoted to front man Lars Gunblade

Rock Wasteland has devoted yet another issue to The No Talent Ass Clowns. In this issue, Lars has a testy interview with famed Rock Wasteland journalist, Dora Stanhope. Here are a few highlights…

Rock Wasteland: Some say you’re a hopeless egomaniac who can’t sing, can’t play and can’t write. They even say you’re a perpetual liar.

Lars: Hey, I am not a perpetual liar. Wait, what does “perpetual” mean?

Rock Wasteland: Tell me, how is the band doing? Did Vas ask about me? Is he seeing someone?

Lars: I thought this interview was going to be about me. I want to talk about me, not the band. Next question, Dora.

Rock Wasteland: Does your music have a message? I’m assuming not.

Lars: Is this some sort of trick question? Because if it is, I’m not answering. I’m sorry, what was the question again?

Rock Wasteland: What’s ahead for Lars Gunblade?

Lars: I’m more concerned about what’s behind Lars Gunblade. And it better be some foxy chick with a 38 rack.

Rock Wasteland: How do you respond to critics who say you and your band are worthless?

Lars: Worthless is a relative term.

Rock Wasteland: What do you mean by that?

Lars: I stand by my answer. Next question, Candi.

Rock Wasteland: Dora.

Lars: Whatever.

Rock Wasteland: Well, I really have to be going. Thanks for the interview, Lars.

Lars: Wait, you’re leaving? Has someone ass*ole in the band been telling you that I still have herpes? Well, they’re f**king liars! I’ll kill them. I’ll kill them all! I got an AA-12 shotgun. They’re dead!

COMMENT ON THIS BLOG RIGHT NOW!

  1. Darion J. Huntington says:

    I resent Rock Wasteland’s implication that Lars Gunblade is cooler than I am. No one is cooler than I am.

  2. James McGill, Esq. says:

    It would be a childish waste of my time to read this interview except and it would be a waste of my time to comment here. So I won’t.

  3. Sims Fuego says:

    Never heard of this guy or this magazine.

    RON PAUL 2016.

  4. Love God 521 says:

    Every Lars interview is exactly the same… brilliant!

  5. Ray says:

    I read the entire interview last night after stealing the magazine from my local Barnes & Noble. Just wish I didn’t have to waste that cashier on the way out. Anyway, the interview was pretty good. Lars is in top form.

    • Ricky Fitts says:

      I used to subscribe to this rag for years. Total shit. I got so tired of the way they kissed this band’s collective asses. And this must be the 10th cover that Lars Gunblade has been on!!!!

      • Donald Penopscott says:

        I thoroughly enjoy this publication. Respectfully, I think you’re full of shit.

        • Ricky Fitts says:

          OK, Donald, if that is your real name, anytime you want to say that to my face, you just go ahead.