Comments Off on Shocking New Ass Clowns Stage Set Unveiled
Vas Defrens

Vas Defrens belts out a 120-minute guitar solo during “ass” show

Close on the heels of a show where female audience members were required to be totally naked, a new stage set for The No Talent Ass Clowns is turning heads… and stomachs.

Unveiled at the band’s February 1st show, the curtain opened to reveal an enormous naked ass at the back of the stage made of lifelike foam and latex. After several seconds, the ass was heard to “fart” loudly and a horrible smell was pumped through the arena, sickening many concertgoers and hospitalizing three.

Then, the ass cheeks parted and each member of the band was “shat” out of the latex ass onto the stage. After the final encore, the band proceeded to crawl back into the ass and out of sight of the audience. The ass then proceeded to “fart” again, this time emitting far more noxious fumes that quickly drove the audience from the venue.

“Artistically, it is satisfying,” said guitarist Vas Defrens. “The ass stage set is a personal statement that I have always wanted to make. This is what I want to be remembered for. Definitely.”

Defrens, infamous for his ass fetishes, recently closed his five-star restaurant, The Ass House, in New York City. He sees this stage set as the best way to bring an ass motif to his fans. “Every fan I banged backstage loved it. There’s the proof of how great it is!”

“It was disgusting,” said concertgoer Bill O’Cohen, 16, “But even though my eyes were watering and I threw up from the smell, I have to admit that I liked it.

The band has stated that this will be their permanent stage set for the rest of their career. “You can’t top perfection!” remarked Defrens.


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