Comments Off on New Social Disease Named For Ass Clowns Band

The No Talent Ass ClownsA virulent strain of social disease has been named after legendary band The No Talent Ass Clowns. Named “Assclownus-burning-urineus,” the disease is unique to Ass Clown band members and their legions of groupies.

“It’s a persistent disease,” said Dr. Winston O’Boogie. “Some members of the band, I won’t say who, have horribly disfigured genitalia due to Assclownus-burning-urineus. If I got this disease, I think I’d probably blow my brains out rather than suffer through its multiple mutilating effects.”

“This is friggin’ awesome news!” exclaimed front man Lars Gunblade aboard the band’s tour blimp. “It’s good to know all of that burning when we pee and going to the hospital could turn into something incredible like this. We’ve always wanted to give back to the community and fortunately, this disease will be around long after we all wind up overdosing in some cheap hotel when our careers are over.”

“I’ve had Assclownus-burning-urineus a dozen times,” said a groupie named Bambi. “It’s painful and I’m barren, of course. But, you know what? It was worth it. The band has always paid my medical bills. The Ass Clowns are just totally awesome guys!”

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