Legendary No Talent Ass Clowns front man Lars Gunblade was arrested this morning for possession of 57 tons of marijuana by ATF agents who track him throughout the year.
“57 tons of pot is a lot of pot,” said ATF agent Jacques O’Flaherty. “I mean a whole lot of bud. Like 35 tractor trailers worth actually. I’m not sure Americans collectively smoke that much weed in a year. The crazy part is that this appears to be Lars’ personal stash for just two weeks. This guy spends a lot on stuff like Doritos, let me tell you.”
Within two hours of his arrest, Gunblade was released without charges . “Our manager, Jerry Gold, bought off the cops. Let’s just say a bunch of ATF agents will be red-eyed tonight,” said a smiling Gunblade as he rejoined The No Talent Ass Clowns who are currently working on tracks for a new album before they hit the road touring in May.
“It’s gonna be a green day after all. Thank God they didn’t find my emergency supplies,” said a grinning Gunblade as he fondled several groupies doing a playback.