A fake Time magazine cover showing singer Lars Gunblade of The No Talent Ass Clowns rocked the credibility of the infamous band this week. Spotted by Redit contributor HanAssholeSolo, the fake Time magazine cover can be found on hundreds of websites, all of which assume the cover to be authentic.

Fake Time Magazine Cover

Fake Magazine cover showing Lars Gunblade

Ass Clowns manager Jerry Gold issued a statement early this morning apologizing for the fake Time magazine cover. “This is all a big mistake,” said Gold. “We were just having a bit of fun and people took it seriously. That’s not our fault.”

As it turns out, Gold has actually been promoting the cover for years. In 2011, he said to a reporter for High Times, “Hey, my band is on the cover of f*cking Time magazine. Can you believe it? Now they’re totally legit. Think about it. This is a real Time magazine cover. Lars is really on the cover of Time. How amazing is that?”

When asked about what he said in that High Times interview, Gold coolly declared, “Hey, I never meant that seriously. I’ve always said that it’s a fake Time magazine cover. It’s not my fault if the media is going to go ahead and take something I say in jest as serious.”

Gold grew defensive when asked if he was being serious now or was he still kidding. “That’s a trick question, and I’m not going to answer it. Good day, sir.”

Fake Time Magazine Cover Not a Shock To Fans, Clubs

Several rock clubs that had framed the fake Time magazine cover started taking them down as soon as the story broke. “I put up that cover myself six years,” said Cisco Rocco, the owner of Consumption Auditorium in Kings Nose, NJ. “Now, I find out that it’s all fake. Am I disappointed? No, not really. These are the Ass Clowns we’re talking about. They’re pigs. This is pretty much par for the course with them.”


  1. Pepe 1117232 says:

    I think it’s noble to create fake Time magazine covers of yourself. After all, if it’s good enough for our president, it’s good enough for me.

  2. Tony the Pony says:

    That magazine is currently being used in my bird cage. What are the odds of that?

  3. Carlos Danger says:

    I can’t imagine why anyone in their right mind would want to create a fake Time magazine cover.

  4. Randall McCoy says:

    I’m very disappointed with the No Talent Ass Clowns over this. I used to think that they were a class act. Now when I listen to something like their song “Keep It Clean, But Dirty,” I have to wonder if maybe this band has less integrity than I thought.

    • T-Bone says:

      No integrity? What have you been smoking? The No Talent Ass Clowns are the definition of integrity. Sure, they’re really horrible people but they have integrity out the ass.

  5. Eugene Barkley says:

    The Time magazine isn’t real? I suppose the next thing you’re going to tell me is that The No Talent Ass Clowns aren’t real either?

  6. The REAL Hammer says:

    I had that issue of Time magazine but my girlfriend threw up all over it a few years ago when she was drunk. I kicked her out of my apartment for that but the damage was done.

  7. Tim Olsen says:

    I’d like to say that this blog was fascinating but I’d be lying.

  8. David Dennison says:

    Truth is overrated. Alternate reality is actually more real than reality when you get used to the idea. I respect Jerry Gold sticking to his guns on this one.

  9. John Miller says:

    Who the hell would try to pass off a fake Time magazine cover as real? Sad!

  10. Not Lew Flapp says:

    Wait, this can’t be right. I have this issue of Time and Lars is definitely on the cover. WTF?

    • Meat Pants says:

      I have this issue as well. I just sold it on eBay for $200 bucks. It’s super rare.