A band’s embarrassing drunk interview is the topic of conversation in the rock world. Many think that mega band The No Talent Ass Clowns just took a dump on their reputation by releasing an interview showing them completely drunk beyond belief.
“I like the interview,” said front man Lars Gunblade. “This is what Vas and I are really like. To not post this video would smack of political correctness and we don’t go in for political correctness. I mean, let’s be honest, political correctness is really just common courtesy, right? It’s the desire to not deliberately offend someone else because you realize that there’s no god-given right to spew hate speak. Here’s the point, we think we do have that god-given right. If you’ve never played rock and roll music in a band, you’re totally inferior to us and must suffer consequences. It’s why I have tased fans at concerts all the time. They totally deserve it.”
Band’s Embarrassing Drunk Interview Doesn’t Bother Manager
“I have no opinion about it,” said Ass Clowns Manager Jerry Gold. “This interview shows the band exactly the way fans prefer them: drunk, inarticulate and stupid. Fortunately, that describes the fans as well so it’s all good, I guess. I think that 20 or 30 years ago that an interview like this could have ended a band’s career. Now, it’s just adds to their legacy in a positive way. I suppose eventually we’ll release that video footage of them sacrificing some virgins after a concert in Cleveland back in the late 90s. It gets pretty offensive and there’s blood everywhere. Actually, the footage used to give me nightmares but I’m good with it now. Will it be released? We’ll see.”
Vas Defrens’ Janitor Controversy
The band’s embarrassing drunk interview brought up a controversy that guitarist Vas Defrens would rather not revisit. “I don’t remember anything about this interview,” said Defrens. “I think this is all faked CGI of me and not real. I didn’t assault no janitor so that footage in there where I’m saying I did is bogus.” This incident with the janitor has been disputed by Defrens many times over the years. The janitor in question, Chico O’Brian, was left a quadriplegic after the attack and has tried unsuccessfully to sue Defrens half a dozen times. O’Brian, who now works as a greeter at CD Wasteland in Kings Nose, NJ was unavailable for comment.