Rock bad boys The No Talent Ass Clowns will soon release a compressed CD that will destroy most sound systems it’s played on. Entitled Brain Dump, the new album creates a sound so distorted by compression that it will shatter most speakers currently available. “I really felt the tracks needed more compression,” said producer Bruce Dickinson. I told the band that I had a fever and the only prescription was more compression.”
“Other bands are compressing the shit out of the audio and getting people pissed off,” said front man Lars Gunblade. “We figured why not take it to the next logical step? If a band like Imagine Dragons can release a CD that is widely criticized for being too compressed, surely we can outdo those smug hipsters. I’ve tried listening to Brain Dump myself and, yeah, it’s basically unf*cking listenable. This is exactly what our fans deserve!”
Brain Dump, which contains the new hit song Hammered, will hit the street on October 1.
Long-time fan, first-time commenter. I think this band totally kicks ass and I pumped to hear this new CD. I’m not too happy that it’s going to destroy my stereo. That kind of sucks. But, f**k it, I live for rock and roll, dude.
Your first-time comment is pretty lame, Archie. I hope you’ll work a little harder to say something remotely interesting next time.
You live for rock and roll? Somehow I doubt that.
Yo T-Bone,
Did you finally get internet privileges at the big house?
Hey Meat Pants,
Yeah, I had to do some things I ain’t proud of to get internet privileges. Wish I could have just blown the guards instead. Whatever. But I digress.
Anyway, still glad I put a cap in Lew Flapp’s ass. [[Site Moderator: http://www.thenotalentassclowns.com/?p=2255%5D%5D He deserved it. I’m really into this new CD even though it’s so distorted that I can’t tell what I’m listening to.
No one’s missed you here, murderer.
Sup, Walter.
Sorry you feel that way. Just goes to show you that even though someone can be an Ass Clowns fan, they can still be an asshole. Who knew?
Wow, everybody at this site is a real dick. I’ll never post here ever again.
Don’t listen to ’em, Archie. Don’t be a coward.
Archie,
You’ll be missed.
You’d have to be nuts to listen to these people.
I WILL BUY THIS CD FOR THE TITLE ALONE!!!
I will never buy a No Talent Ass Clowns CD. Not now. Not ever.
Same here. I’ve always wanted an album cover showing some guy’s head sliced open like this. I am ecstatic!
Whatever music is on the CD I’m not especially interested in.
This CD and this band sound really, really stupid. i would NEVER buy this CD, not even if I was suffocating and there was oxegen in the jewal box.
I hate this band!!!! Why should I buy a CD that wrecks my friggin’ speakers? WTF? This band has totally lost it. That being said, I’ll buy it of course because I’m a major fan. But it bugs me.
I’d gladly destroy my sound system to crank up this Ass Clowns CD. So it’s distorted? That’s just the way Lars, Vas, Carnage and Joey roll. What’s your problem?
Listening to an album and hearing it clearly is overrated. I much prefer bass that is so compressed that the distortion hurts my ears. That’s how music was intended to be.
Well said.
I agree. “Not Lew Flapp” sounds like a genuine, class A, number one asshole. Hey, troll, just go home.
Just because I’m paid by a major music label to go on websites and say bad things about other bands does not mean I’m a troll. Let’s just be clear about that.
Well, I just blew two grand on my sound system but I’ve got to hear the new album. Guess I better start saving for new speakers.