A CD of farts has been sold for 2 million dollars to an anonymous CEO of a pharmaceutical company. Rocker Lars Gunblade of The No Talent Ass Clowns decided on a whim to release a single copy of a CD entitled “The Magic Book of Farts” consisting exclusively of farts created and recorded by Gunblade.
“One night I was wasted and I wound up eating two cans of black beans,” said Gunblade. “Within five minutes, the farts started coming. But these weren’t your garden-variety types of farts. These were the eye-watering kind that smell like some dead animal starting to rot. I grabbed my recorder and started to capture each fart as it presented itself. I gotta admit I almost passed out because the air was gettin’ pretty horrible at that point. But somehow I kept from losing consciousness and I realized that I had like 40 minutes of farts. That’s long enough for a CD. That’s when it hit me. I should release it as a solo CD. Why not put out a CD of farts? So here it is. Some are angry sounding while others are pensive and reluctant. That’s quite an artistic range.”
CD of Farts: No Ripoff, says Gunblade
Following the band’s new policy of only releasing one CD of new recordings for a set price of two million dollars, Gunblade put the CD up for sale over the weekend and it sold within 30 minutes. According to Gunblade, there is virtually no production or editing involved. “It’s a 40-minute CD of farts. My farts. That’s it. To me, it’s every bit as artistic as some great guitar riff. And at least no one can claim that I stole these farts from old blues songs. Nobody is gonna say, ‘Hey, nice farts but I heard them originally from Blind Joe Reynolds or Big Bill Broonzy.’ Yeah, I’m lookin’ at you, Led Zeppelin!”
The anonymous buyer releases a statement about the CD that read: This is really awesome. I would have paid three million for it if that’s what Lars wanted.