Comments Off on Ass Clown Guitarist Vas Defrens Weds Porn Star Trixie Beaumont

Controversial No Talent Ass Clowns guitarist Vas Defrens married porn star Trixie Beaumont at the musician’s “Rectal Hall” estate in Montana on Saturday. The two have been an item for several years so the super-secret wedding didn’t come as a surprise to fans.

Known for his shocking perversity, Defrens sent an semi X-rated invitation to friends showing himself and Trixie Beaumont having sex. “That invitation made me definitely want to be at this wedding,” said a famous musician who urgently requested not to be named. “After the ceremony, they had an explicit photo session and Trixie wound up satisfying everyone taking pictures. Needless to say, it was the best wedding reception ever,” gushed the anonymous musician.

Trixie Beaumont, famous for such adult videos as “Anal Hospital 7” and “Asscapades: The Reckoning,” said the timing was right for a wedding. “I’m not HIV positive yet so I figured let Vas put a ring on it before something happens because, let’s face it, something will.”

No other No Talent Ass Clowns were present, fueling speculation that Defrens was the only musician in the band who didn’t require castration as a result of doing a nude concert during the recent polar vortex. “I don’t want those guys here,” shouted Defrens as he drunkenly groped Beaumont in front of photographers during the reception. “They’ve got dirty minds. Who needs that? Our love is pure, dude. Here, watch how pure it is!”